你妈注定让你抓狂

愿每一位伟大的妈妈都能做自己，节日快乐！

🤔️小作业：

1. What does the 'family systems theory' as described in the article imply about individual roles within a family?

A) Family roles are flexible and frequently change over time. B) Each family member chooses their role consciously.

C) Family roles are fixed and serve to maintain the family's balance.

D) Family roles are determined externally by societal norms.

A) Mothers and daughters rarely experience conflicts. B) Daughters often feel criticized, while mothers think their daughters are too sensitive.

C) Daughters usually control the relationship dynamics.

D) Mothers and daughters communicate without misunderstandings.

无注释原文：

Your Mom Is Destined to Annoy You

From: The New York Times

I have a 48-hour serenity limit when I’m with my parents. After two days, it’s like an alarm sounds inside me and sends me right back to 1999. I’m a petulant teenager again with a bad attitude, and everything my mother says, no matter how innocuous, inspires the response, “Ugh, Mom, stop nagging me!”

This unstoppable regression, which has been going on since I left for college, felt worse once I became a parent myself. I am an extremely grown woman now, I thought. I am beyond this. But, like clockwork, by the third day of exposure to my mom and dad, I’d be back in the ’90s, scowling and blasting the Breeders in a borrowed Honda.

I am far from alone in this. Psychologists even have a term to describe the way we fall back into predictable, maddening behavior patterns when we’re with our family of origin. It’s called family systems theory — the notion that families have an equilibrium, and each person has a fixed role that “is in service of keeping the family system intact,” said Pooja Lakshmin, M.D., a clinical assistant professor of psychiatry at the George Washington University School of Medicine & Health Sciences. So whatever your established role is — whether you’re the appeaser, or the family clown, or the petulant one — you’re going to be thrown right back there the second you walk through the door of your childhood home.

Kira Birditt, Ph.D., a research associate professor at the University of Michigan who has studied tension between adult children and their parents, said that 94 percent of respondents in her study on the topic reported some kind of strife in their relationships. Research also shows that the connection between mothers and adult daughters is especially fraught; Dr. Birditt described it as “the closest and most irritating” of almost all relationships. (One of the most life-changing episodes of my early adulthood was noticing my own mother get sulky at something her mother said.)

So, how do you get through the holidays with your folks without losing your damn mind? Here’s some sanity-preserving advice.

Prepare for your inevitable regression. It’s not a question of if the regression is going to happen, it’s when. Dr. Lakshmin advised that you do some mental work before visiting your family so that you can avoid triggering your worst behaviors. Ask yourself: Are there particular topics of conversation or physical places that tend to send your family into a tizzy? And then try to avoid those topics and places. Even changing scenery can help jog you out of old patterns, so if the family dinner table always devolves into chaos, try going out to eat one night and see if it improves relations.

Try to find empathy. The most typical negative mother-daughter interaction involves this dynamic: Adult daughters feel criticized by their mothers, and mothers feel their daughters are being too sensitive, said Deborah Tannen, Ph.D., a professor of linguistics at Georgetown University and the author of “You’re Wearing That? Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation.” How the grandchildren are being raised is a major trigger for this dynamic, Dr. Tannen said: “Many women told me that they could take criticism about anything except their mothering skills.”

Dr. Tannen’s advice for grandparents: Bite your tongue, because even the most benign (to you) suggestion may be perceived as criticism. Her advice for adult daughters is, “try to remind yourself that it feels like criticism, but it is an expression of caring.” Your mother just wants everything to go well for you, and she’s trying to help (even if it makes you want to scream into a pillow).

Make space for yourself. You will need an escape hatch from time to time. “Whether this means hiding out in the bathroom for 10 minutes to cool down, structuring the length of visits or springing for a hotel rather than staying in your parents’ guest room,” make sure you’re somehow creating a space where you can get some emotional distance from your family, said Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and author of “The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships.” I always make sure I can exercise in the morning when I’m with family — it gives me a break from them and also is a good conduit for ambient rage.

Don’t expect change. The last thing to remember is that there won’t be a magical solution to your family trauma over the holidays, Dr. Lakshmin said. December is a stressful time — mental health professionals say it’s particularly hard on their patients — and it’s not the time to bring up old baggage and expect to work through it.

- ◆ -

注：完整题目见本文开头；中文文本为纽约时报官方译文，仅供参考

含注释全文：

Your Mom Is Destined to Annoy You

你妈注定让你抓狂

From: The New York Times

I have a 48-hour serenity limit when I’m with my parents. After two days, it’s like an alarm sounds inside me and sends me right back to 1999. I’m a petulant teenager again with a bad attitude, and everything my mother says, no matter how innocuous, inspires the response, “Ugh, Mom, stop nagging me!”

和父母在一起时，我只有48小时的心态平和期。但凡过了两天，我身体里就会像响起警报一样，让我重返1999年。我又会变成一个不耐烦的暴躁少年，妈妈说的每一句话，无论多么无害，都会引来我这样的反应：“唉，妈，别再唠叨我了！”

serenity /səˈren.ə.ti/ 表示“平静;安详”，英文解释为“the quality of being peaceful and calm”举个🌰：The hotel offers a tranquil haven of peace and serenity, away from the bustle of the city. 这家酒店是一个宁静的避风港，远离城市的喧嚣。

petulant /ˈpetʃ.ə.lənt/ 表示“耍孩子脾气的，任性的；脾气暴躁的”，英文解释为“easily annoyed and complaining in a rude way like a child”

innocuous /ɪˈnɒk.ju.əs/ 表示“无害的；无恶意的；无意冒犯的”，英文解释为“completely harmless (= causing no harm)；not intended to offend or upset anyone”举个🌰：Some mushrooms look innocuous but are in fact poisonous. 有些蘑菇貌似无害，但实际上有毒。

nag /næɡ/ 表示“不断批评（或抱怨）；跟…纠缠不休；唠叨”，英文解释为“to criticize or complain often in an annoying way”举个🌰：My mum's always nagging me to get my hair cut. 我妈妈总是唠叨着要我去理发。

This unstoppable regression, which has been going on since I left for college, felt worse once I became a parent myself. I am an extremely grown woman now, I thought. I am beyond this. But, like clockwork, by the third day of exposure to my mom and dad, I’d be back in the ’90s, scowling and blasting the Breeders in a borrowed Honda.

这种无法遏制的退化行为，从我上大学开始就一直在发生，当我自己成为家长后则变得更加严重。我以为我现在是个非常成熟的女性。我已经过了那个阶段了。但就像上了发条的钟一样，一到和父母接触的第三天，我又会置身90年代那辆借来的本田车里，皱着眉头高声播放着饲养员乐队(The Breeders)的音乐。

regression /rɪˈɡreʃ.ən/ 表示“（病症）消退”，英文解释为“the fact of an illness or its symptoms (= effects) becoming less severe”举个🌰：The treatment was more effective than tamoxifen, which causes complete regression in only about 30% of cases. 这种治疗比他莫昔芬更为有效，只有约30%的患者在接受他莫昔芬治疗后病症完全消退。

2）表示“后退，倒退；退化”，英文解释为“a return to a former or less developed state”

3）表示“回归（分析）”，英文解释为“A regression is a statistical technique that relates a dependent variable to one or more independent (explanatory) variables.”

scowl /skaʊl/ 表示“阴沉着脸看，怒目而视”，英文解释为“to look at someone or something with a very annoyed expression”举个🌰：The boy scowled at her and reluctantly followed her back into school. 男孩对她阴沉着脸，很不情愿地跟着她回了学校。

作名词，blast /blɑːst/ 1）表示“爆炸；爆破”，英文解释为“an explosion”举个🌰：Three people were injured in the blast. 爆炸中有3人受伤。

2）表示“（突然发出的）响声”，英文解释为“a sudden loud noise”如：a blast of music 突然响起的音乐。

作动词，1）表示“炸毁；爆破”，英文解释为“to explode or destroy something or someone with explosives, or to break through or hit something with a similar, very strong force”

2）表示“抨击，严厉批评”，英文解释为“to criticize someone or something severely”举个🌰：They were blasted for failing to create jobs. 他们因未能创造工作机会而遭到抨击。

3）表示“产生巨大噪声；发出刺耳声”，英文解释为“to make a very loud and unpleasant noise”如：guns/music blasting (away/out) 炮声隆隆/音乐震天响。

I am far from alone in this. Psychologists even have a term to describe the way we fall back into predictable, maddening behavior patterns when we’re with our family of origin. It’s called family systems theory — the notion that families have an equilibrium, and each person has a fixed role that “is in service of keeping the family system intact,” said Pooja Lakshmin, M.D., a clinical assistant professor of psychiatry at the George Washington University School of Medicine & Health Sciences. So whatever your established role is — whether you’re the appeaser, or the family clown, or the petulant one — you’re going to be thrown right back there the second you walk through the door of your childhood home.

在这个问题上，我可不是孤例。心理学家甚至有一个术语来描述回到原生家庭时，我们身上出现的可预测的、令人抓狂的退化行为模式。这个术语叫做家庭系统理论，乔治·华盛顿大学(George Washington University)医学与健康科学学院的精神病学临床助理教授普贾·拉克什明(Pooja Lakshmin)博士说，家庭都有各自的平衡，每个人在“维持家庭系统完好的过程中”都扮演着固定的角色。所以，不管你的既定角色是什么——安抚者、小丑或是脾气暴躁的人——当踏进童年时代家庭大门的一刻，你就会重新回到那个角色之中。

maddening /ˈmæd.ən.ɪŋ/ 表示“使人恼怒的”，英文解释为“making you angry”举个🌰：She has a maddening habit of interrupting me when I'm talking to her. 和她说话时她老打断我，这个毛病让我十分恼火。

notion /ˈnəʊ.ʃən/ 表示“观念；看法；理解；概念”，英文解释为“a belief or idea”举个🌰：The show's director rejects the notion that seeing violence on television has a harmful effect on children. 节目制片人们并不认为看到电视上的暴力场景会对孩子们造成不良影响。

equilibrium /ˌek.wɪˈlɪb.ri.əm/ 1）表示“平衡；均衡”，英文解释为“a state of balance”举个🌰：The disease destroys much of the inner ear, disturbing the animal's equilibrium. 这种疾病破坏动物内耳的大部分组织，妨碍其保持均衡。

2）表示“（心情或情绪的）平静，安宁；心理平衡”，英文解释为“a calm mental state”举个🌰：Yoga is said to restore one's inner equilibrium. 据说练瑜伽可以使人恢复内心的平静。

intact /ɪnˈtækt/ 表示“完好无损；完整”，英文解释为“ complete and not damaged”举个🌰：Most of the house remains intact even after two hundred years. 虽然过了两百年，这房子的大部分还保持完好。He emerged from the trial with his reputation intact. 他受审获释，名誉丝毫未受损害。

🎬《奇异博士》（Doctor Strange）中的台词提到的：Cranial nerves intact. 脑神经完好无损。

psychiatry /saɪˈkaɪətrɪ/ 表示“精神病学”，英文解释为“Psychiatry is the branch of medicine concerned with the treatment of mental illness.”

📍词根“-iatry”表示“医学”，前缀“psych-”表示“精神”。

appease /əˈpiːz/ 表示“平息；抚慰；姑息”，英文解释为“to prevent further disagreement in arguments or war by giving to the other side an advantage that they have demanded”

📍appeaser指人。

clown /klaʊn/ 表示“丑角，小丑”，英文解释为“an entertainer who wears funny clothes, has a painted face, and makes people laugh by performing tricks and behaving in a silly way”或者表示“（常指故意）出洋相的人；愚蠢可笑的人”，英文解释为“someone who behaves in a silly way, often intentionally”

Kira Birditt, Ph.D., a research associate professor at the University of Michigan who has studied tension between adult children and their parents, said that 94 percent of respondents in her study on the topic reported some kind of strife in their relationships. Research also shows that the connection between mothers and adult daughters is especially fraught; Dr. Birditt described it as “the closest and most irritating” of almost all relationships. (One of the most life-changing episodes of my early adulthood was noticing my own mother get sulky at something her mother said.)

密歇根大学(University of Michigan)的研究副教授基拉·伯迪特(Kira Birditt)博士一直在研究成年子女及父母之间的紧张关系，她表示，在她关于这一主题的研究中，94%的受访者声称他们的关系存在某种冲突。研究还表明，母亲和成年女儿之间的关系尤其紧张。伯迪特称这几乎是所有人际关系中“最亲密也最气人的”。（在我刚成年的时候发生的改变我人生的事之一，就是注意到自己的母亲会对她母亲所说的话生气。）

respondent /rɪˈspɒn.dənt/ 表示“回答者；答复者；应答者”，英文解释为“a person who answers a request for information”举个🌰：In a recent opinion poll, a majority of respondents were against nuclear weapons. 在最近的一次民意调查中，大多数调查对象表示反对发展核武器。

strife /straɪf/ 表示“纠纷；争吵；争斗；冲突”，英文解释为“Strife is strong disagreement or fighting.”举个🌰：Money is a major cause of strife in many marriages. 钱在许多婚姻中是导致冲突的一个主要原因。

fraught /frɔːt/ 1）表示“充满（问题或风险）的”，英文解释为“If a situation or action is fraught with problems or risks, it is filled with them.”举个🌰：The earliest operations employing this technique were fraught with dangers.  最早采用这一技术的手术充满了危险。

2）表示“令人担忧的”，英文解释为“If you say that a situation or action is fraught, you mean that it is worrisome or difficult. ”举个🌰：It has been a somewhat fraught day.  这是令人颇为担忧的一天。

🎬电影《兰戈》（Rango）中的台词提到：The path to knowledge is fraught with consequence. 通往真知的道路充满了荆棘坎坷。

irritating /ˈɪr.ɪ.teɪ.tɪŋ/ 表示“恼人的，令人厌烦的”，英文解释为“making you feel annoyed”如：an irritating habit 烦人的习惯；

irritate作动词，表示“激怒”，英文解释为“If something irritates you, it keeps annoying you.”举个🌰：Their attitude irritates me. 他们的态度激怒了我。

在电视/电影节目中，episode /ˈep.ɪ.səʊd/ 表示“一集，一节，片断”（one of the single parts into which a story is divided, especially when it is broadcast on the television or radio），也可以指“事件；（相关的）一连串事件；一段经历”，英文解释为“a single event or group of related events”举个🌰：This latest episode in the fraud scandal has shocked a lot of people. 诈骗丑闻最新爆出的这一事件让很多人瞠目结舌。

还可以指「疾病的发作，发病」，英文解释为：a finite period in which someone is affected by a specified illness.

补充：

📍第几集用的是Episode，第几季则为Season. 你下载美剧时可能就会看到S01E02，就是指的第1季第2集。最后一集 finale：the last part of a piece of music or of a show, event etc （演出的）终场，最后一幕；（音乐的）终曲；（事件等的）结尾。

🎬还有，看剧时新一集开头通常会有的一个说法：previously on ...，...的前情提要，前情回顾。

sulky /ˈsʌlkɪ/ 表示“生闷气的；愠怒的，绷着脸的”，英文解释为“Someone who is sulky is sulking or is unwilling to enjoy themselves.”举个🌰：I was quite sulky, so I didn't take part in much. 我相当闷闷不乐，所以没有怎么参与。

So, how do you get through the holidays with your folks without losing your damn mind? Here’s some sanity-preserving advice.

那么，要如何心平气和地与家人一起度过假期呢？这里有一些帮你保持理智的建议。

sanity /ˈsæn.ə.ti/ 1）表示“明智；理智；通情达理”，英文解释为“the state of being sensible and reasonable”举个🌰：After a series of road accidents the police pleaded for sanity among drivers. 在发生一系列交通事故之后，警方提请驾驶人要谨慎驾车。

2）表示“精神健全；神志正常”，英文解释为“the state of having a normal healthy mind”举个🌰：His behaviour was so strange that I began to doubt his sanity. 他行为怪异，我有点怀疑他是否神智正常。

preserve /prɪˈzɜːv/ 表示“保护，维护；保留；保养”，英文解释为“to keep something as it is, especially in order to prevent it from decaying or being damaged or destroyed”如：to preserve the environment 保护环境。

Prepare for your inevitable regression. It’s not a question of if the regression is going to happen, it’s when. Dr. Lakshmin advised that you do some mental work before visiting your family so that you can avoid triggering your worst behaviors. Ask yourself: Are there particular topics of conversation or physical places that tend to send your family into a tizzy? And then try to avoid those topics and places. Even changing scenery can help jog you out of old patterns, so if the family dinner table always devolves into chaos, try going out to eat one night and see if it improves relations.

为不可避免的退化行为做好准备。这不是你是否会退化的问题，而是何时出现退化行为的问题。拉克什明博士建议，当你拜访家人之前，做一些心理准备工作，这样就可以避免触发最糟糕的行为。先问问你自己：有没有什么特定的话题或现实场合会刺激你的家人发疯？如果有，就请避开这些话题和场合。即使是变换一下环境，也能帮你从旧有模式中走出来，所以，如果家庭晚宴的餐桌上总会出现闹剧，试着出去吃一顿，看看是否能改善关系。

trigger /ˈtrɪɡ.ər/ 1）作动词，除了表示“发动；引起；触发”，英文解释为“to make sth happen suddenly”举个🌰：Nuts can trigger off a violent allergic reaction. 坚果可以引起严重的过敏反应。

2）作名词，表示“扳机”，英文解释为“The trigger of a gun is a small lever which you pull to fire it.”举个🌰：A man pointed a gun at them and pulled the trigger. 一个男人用枪指着他们，扣动了扳机。

类似的还有：

📍stir表示“激发，激起（强烈的感情）；引起（强烈的反应）”，英文解释为“to make someone have a strong feeling or reaction”举个🌰：The poem succeeds in stirring the imagination. 这首诗能够激发起想象力。

📍provoke也表示“激起，引起”，英文解释为“to cause a reaction or feeling, especially a sudden one”，如：provoke debate/discussion 激起辩论/讨论。

📍spur 鼓动；激励；鞭策；刺激；鼓舞”，英文解释为“If one thing spurs you to do another, it encourages you to do it.”举个🌰：It's the money that spurs these fishermen to risk a long ocean journey in their flimsy boats. 是金钱驱使这些渔民驾驶单薄的小船冒险出海远航。

🎬电影《龙之心3：巫师的诅咒》（Dragonheart 3: The Sorcerer's Curse）中的台词提到：To spur the clans to war. 激励部族发起战争。

tizzy /ˈtɪz.i/ 表示“（短暂的）慌乱，紧张”，英文解释为“a temporary state of worry and confusion”举个🌰：She got herself in a real tizzy because she couldn't find her car keys. 由于找不到车钥匙，她着实慌乱了一阵。

jog /dʒɒɡ/ 1）表示“慢跑（尤指作为健身锻炼的方式）”，英文解释为“to run at a slow, regular speed, especially as a form of exercise”

2）表示“（尤指用胳膊）轻推，轻碰，轻撞”，英文解释为“to push or knock someone or something slightly, especially with your arm”举个🌰：A man rushed past and jogged her elbow, making her drop the bag. 一名男子匆匆走过，撞了她的胳膊肘，使她的包掉到地上。

3）jog sb's memory表示“唤起（某人的）记忆，提醒（某人）”，英文解释为“to make someone remember something”举个🌰：The police showed him a photo to try to jog his memory about what had happened on the night of the robbery. 警方给他看了一张照片，想让他记起抢劫的当晚发生了什么。

在这个语境中，jog表示“促使（某人）回想起”或“使（某人）摆脱习惯性的思维或行为模式”。jog you out of old patterns指的是通过改变环境帮助某人摆脱旧的行为模式或习惯，让人以新的视角看待问题或情况。

devolve /dɪˈvɒlv/ 表示“移交，转移（权力或职责）”，英文解释为“to (cause power or responsibility to) be given to other people”举个🌰：To be a good manager, you must know how to devolve responsibility downwards. 要成为一名优秀的经理就必须懂得如何向下放权。

devolve into表示“逐渐变成，演变成；恶化成；退化成”。它常用于描述情况、讨论或事件从积极或中立状态变得负面或混乱。

Try to find empathy. The most typical negative mother-daughter interaction involves this dynamic: Adult daughters feel criticized by their mothers, and mothers feel their daughters are being too sensitive, said Deborah Tannen, Ph.D., a professor of linguistics at Georgetown University and the author of “You’re Wearing That? Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation.” How the grandchildren are being raised is a major trigger for this dynamic, Dr. Tannen said: “Many women told me that they could take criticism about anything except their mothering skills.”

试着找到同理心。乔治敦大学(Georgetown University)语言学教授、《你穿这个？用对话理解母女》(You’re Wearing That? Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation)一书的作者黛博拉·坦南(Deborah Tannen)博士表示，最典型的负面母女互动总包含这样一种动态：成年女儿觉得受到了母亲的批评，而母亲又觉得女儿太过敏感。如何抚育孙辈是引发这一动态的主要因素，坦南博士说：“很多女性告诉我，除了育儿技能，她们基本什么批评都可以接受。”

empathy /ˈem.pə.θi/ 表示“同情；同感，共鸣”，英文解释为“the ability to share someone else's feelings or experiences by imagining what it would be like to be in that person's situation”

🎬电影《谍影重重4》（The Bourne Legacy）中的台词提到：Amped mission fidelity, minimized empathy 增强了任务忠诚度，降低了情感因素。

🎬电影《爸爸的好儿子》（That's My Boy）中的台词提到：with unending empathy, encouragement and honesty, 永恒的爱 鼓励和忠诚。

对比：

📍sympathy /ˈsɪmpəθɪ/ 表示“同情（心），理解”，英文解释为“(an expression of) understanding and care for someone else's suffering”举个🌰：He don't have much sympathy for her. 他不太同情她。

linguistics /lɪŋˈɡwɪs.tɪks/ 表示“语言学”，英文解释为“the scientific study of the structure and development of language in general or of particular languages”

Dr. Tannen’s advice for grandparents: Bite your tongue, because even the most benign (to you) suggestion may be perceived as criticism. Her advice for adult daughters is, “try to remind yourself that it feels like criticism, but it is an expression of caring.” Your mother just wants everything to go well for you, and she’s trying to help (even if it makes you want to scream into a pillow).

坦南博士给祖父母的建议是：不要多话，因为即便是（在你看来）最善意的建议，也可能被视为批评。她给成年女儿们的建议则是，“试着提醒自己，虽然那听起来像是批评，但却是关心的表现。”你的母亲只是希望你一切都顺利，而她想尽力帮上忙（即使这让你想埋在枕头里尖叫）。

表示“缄口不语”，英文解释为“to stop yourself from saying something that you would really like to say”举个🌰：I wanted to tell him exactly what I thought of him, but I had to bite my tongue. 我本想明确告诉他我对他的看法，可是不得不保持沉默。

perceive /pəˈsiːv/ 1）表示“感知，察觉，注意到，意识到”，英文解释为“to see something or someone, or to notice something that is obvious”举个🌰：He perceived a tiny figure in the distance. 他注意到远处有个很小的身影。

2）表示“认为；看待；视为”，英文解释为“to come to an opinion about something, or have a belief about something”举个🌰：How do the French perceive the British? 法国人是如何看待英国人的？

📍《经济学人》（The Economist）一篇讲述比特币的文章中提到：Scarcity is a trait of many things that are perceived to have value. 稀缺性正是许多被视为有价值的事物共有的特征。

Make space for yourself. You will need an escape hatch from time to time. “Whether this means hiding out in the bathroom for 10 minutes to cool down, structuring the length of visits or springing for a hotel rather than staying in your parents’ guest room,” make sure you’re somehow creating a space where you can get some emotional distance from your family, said Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and author of “The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships.” I always make sure I can exercise in the morning when I’m with family — it gives me a break from them and also is a good conduit for ambient rage.

给自己留点空间。你有时会需要一个逃生出口。临床心理学家、《愤怒之舞：改变亲密关系模式的女性指南》(The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships)一书作者哈丽雅特·莱纳(Harriet Lerner)博士说，“不管这意味着要在浴室里躲10分钟冷静一下、安排好拜访的时间长短，还是花钱住旅馆而不是住在父母家的客房”，你都要确保自己能创造一个可以与家人产生一定情感距离的空间。当我和家人在一起时，总要确保自己能进行晨练——这让我从他们之中解脱出来，同时也是发泄对周遭环境愤怒的好渠道。

escape hatch /ɪˈskeɪp ˌhætʃ/ 表示“（潜艇的）紧急出口”，英文解释为“the part of a submarine through which people can leave when it is underwater”或者表示“（摆脱困境等的）出路；（解决困难等的）办法”，英文解释为“a way of getting out of a difficult or unwanted situation”举个🌰：The psychiatrist offered him an escape hatch from his feelings of guilt. 精神科医师找到了办法帮助他消除负罪感。

structure /ˈstrʌk.tʃər/ 作动词，表示“使形成体系；系统安排；精心组织”，英文解释为“to arrange or organize sth into a system or pattern”举个🌰：How well does the teacher structure the lessons? 老师对课程组织安排得如何？

表示“（通常替其他人）支付（或购买）（某物）”，英文解释为“to pay for or buy something, often for someone else”举个🌰：They offered to spring for the tickets. 他们愿意出钱买票。

intimate /ˈɪn.tɪ.mət/ 表示“亲密的；有性关系的；宜于密切关系的”，英文解释为“having, or being likely to cause, a very close friendship or personal or sexual relationship”如：intimate relationships 亲密关系，举个🌰：The restaurant has a very intimate atmosphere. 这家餐厅的氛围很怡人。

conduit /ˈkɒn.dʒuː.ɪt/ 1）表示“（水、电线等的）管道，导管”，英文解释为“a pipe or passage for water or electrical wires to go through”

2）表示“（连接两地的）渠道”，英文解释为“a way of connecting two places”

ambient /ˈæm.bi.ənt/ 表示“周围环境的；周围的”，英文解释为“relating to the surrounding area; on all sides”，如：ambient temperature/light/conditions  周围的温度/光线/环境。

rage /reɪdʒ/作动词，表示“肆虐；迅速蔓延；快速扩散”，英文解释为“You say that something powerful or unpleasant rages when it continues with great force or violence.”举个🌰：Train service was halted as the fire raged for more than four hours. 火车停运了，因为大火肆虐了四个多小时。

作名词，表示“（一阵）盛怒；（一阵）狂怒；（一阵）暴怒”，英文解释为“(a period of) extreme or violent anger”举个🌰：Her sudden towering rages were terrifying. 她突然暴跳如雷，很吓人。

短语：

📍be (all) the rage表示“风靡一时，非常时兴，十分流行”（to be very popular at a particular time），此前在印度新婚夫妇在自家厕所自拍可获奖励？文中就提到Pre-wedding toilet selfies are becoming all the rage in Madhya Pradesh. 印度人婚前在厕所自拍非常盛行，再举个🌰：Long hair for men was all the rage in the 70s. 在70年代，男人留长发风靡一时。

Don’t expect change. The last thing to remember is that there won’t be a magical solution to your family trauma over the holidays, Dr. Lakshmin said. December is a stressful time — mental health professionals say it’s particularly hard on their patients — and it’s not the time to bring up old baggage and expect to work through it.

不要期待改变。拉克什明博士说，节日期间的家庭创伤不会有神奇的解决方案。12月本就是充满压力的季节——心理健康专家都说这段时间对他们的病人尤其艰难——所以，这可不是翻旧账并以为能解决这些问题的好时机。

trauma /ˈtrɔːmə/ /ˈtrɑː.mə/ 表示“精神创伤，心理创伤”，英文解释为“(a) severe emotional shock and pain caused by an extremely upsetting experience”举个🌰：He had psychotherapy to help him deal with his childhood traumas. 他进行了心理治疗以医治童年时代受到的心理创伤。

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